Comments on: Do you have an Adoption Story?

By: Katie

Katie — Wed, 30 Dec 2009 05:59:32 +0000

Paige, just you know, you were featured on an anti-adoption page and that is why you got so many negative comments.

http://www.inquisitor.com/pcgi-bin/media.cgi?NA=Media&AC=List&SC=Some&DI=Damn&SU=horrors&SO=sort_date&PO=3

Scroll to the bottom of the page.

Good luck with your book!

By: Jack

Jack — Thu, 12 Nov 2009 14:31:02 +0000

I think many are missing the purpose of this cookbook. It is not intended to offend anyone or glorify the abandonment of children. It is not intended to glorify the adopting parents. The reality is that these children are abandoned/unwanted or unable to be cared for by their birth parents and that is unchangeable by the adopting parents. The agony for some parents must be excruciating, knowing that they have given up their flesh and blood to be cared for by strangers. I know that it is also painful for the children, many never being able to shake the pain and stigmas that it carries.
BUT, the act of adoption is an act of redemption. Christ intervening in the lives of these children restoring a sense of family and hope. A family to laugh with, celebrate with, and cry with. This life is not always easy, but with time and love wounds can heal.
For those who were abandoned, I am truly sorry. For those who surrendered their children, I am truly sorry. For those abused by an adoptive parent, I am truly sorry. For those who surrendered themselves, to offer a love, family, a better life for those less fortunate, I say Thank You!!!
The purpose of this cookbook is to encourage other families to step up and step out, to show them that they can risk it all to add a stranger to their lives and that it will be okay on the other side. To show that through the trials, God will see you through. I say to any adoptee, or adopter who is hurt or offended, surrender it to God. He can and will heal your pain.

By: Really?

Really? — Sun, 08 Nov 2009 01:26:39 +0000

I suppose adoption, the process of a mother losing her child, is much more palatable when you pretend that those little adoptlings are cookies coming out of an oven for you entitled consumption instead of real live people coming out of real live va-hoo-hoos.
It’s much easier to take a cookie from an oven thean the arms of his or her mother.
Yes, I can definitely see why this is better for you.
But I got news for you. Babies, they ain’t cookies or cakes or pies.
And they don’t appreciate being treated like a commodity.

And BTW would you want your precious child raised by some dope that needed to hold a fundraiser to afford the adoption fees? I wouldn’t.
How tacky.

Good luck! Hope your adoptee stays in the cookie jar and doesn’t go running back to that oven like so many adoptees are doing these days.
Finding those pesky birthparents is the latest trend you know.

You are awesome!

By: Cricket

Cricket — Tue, 03 Nov 2009 01:10:18 +0000

I appreciate the fact that you are a Christian…I just wish you could appreciate the fact that putting out a cookbook dedicated to such a painful experience (adoption) for some would be offensive.

By: Paige

Paige — Sat, 31 Oct 2009 04:15:27 +0000

Cricket,
Thanks so much for taking the time to stop by my blog and leave your thoughts. My computer has been acting up so I apologize for the delay in approving your comment. I’m so sorry to hear that your adoption was not a good experience. You are right the loss and years of pain you have felt are something that myself and many others will probably never understand. I don’t know why you have had to suffer such pain for most of your life and all I can say is I’m sorry. I pray though now somehow you will be able to give that pain to the one and only person who truly gets you and wants to take that pain from you and that is Jesus. He died for you so that you may have life and life abundantly. When were in such pain all the time it’s hard to live an abundant life and even to think a good thought. I’ve learned in my own life that if I will give Jesus my hurt, my anger and whatever it is I’m struggling with he will always take it and then somehow turn it into something good. I just have to make sure I don’t just go to God to dump my stuff and not stay in his presence long enough for him to fill me up with His truth and his peace and comfort. I often just want to dump my stuff, stay mad and leave. God however wants to turn our pain around and give us joy and to use us to comfort those who are hurting. Because of your life experiences I’m sure you will be able to reach a lot of hurting people and possibly give them hope. People that would never listen to me because I haven’t experienced their pain. From the other comments I’ve gotten I’ve learned there are many people/ women especially that are hurting and still grieving over their adoption and life after adoption. God does not just have a plan for some people to prosper and for some to be healed, but he wants all to know the plans he has for us, plans to prosper us and not to harm us. I pray you will somehow feel the holy spirit wrap his arms around you and let you know how much he loves you and wants to take this pain from you. You obviously have a mighty voice and story to tell and I pray you will continue to seek wise counsel and spend time in God’s word to find the answers you are looking for. Then go use your voice to encourage others that don’t know what to do and who to turn to. You might just be the blessing someone is looking for.
Thanks so much for your time. I’ll be praying for you.
Sincerely,
Paige

By: Cricket

Cricket — Fri, 30 Oct 2009 23:42:15 +0000

Hmmm…still in moderation status. I’m starting to get a complex.

By: Cricket

Cricket — Thu, 29 Oct 2009 01:14:28 +0000

My adoption was more like being taken from the frying pan and being put into the fire. My adoptive parents were abusive…in all ways…and to be honest, some days I’m NOT glad to be alive and to have been given to another family. You want the truth? Sometimes, when I hear the “Would you rather have been aborted?”, I’d like to say “Yes….actually I would have…” just for the shock factor.

What some adoptive parents and others don’t understand is that even if I, or other adoptees, had a fantastic childhood, the loss of our origins and families would still be there.

I’d still yearn for the lost years that I didn’t have my natural mother in my life. She’s here now, but that doesn’t erase the years of pain.

By: Paige

Paige — Tue, 27 Oct 2009 12:12:30 +0000

11 A man’s wisdom gives him patience;
it is to his glory to overlook an offense. Proverbs 19:11
Krista,
Thank you so much for taking the time to let me know of your offense about this cookbook. I am truly sorry to hear that the title offends you so much. It was never intended to do that and for that I’m sorry. I’m thrilled to hear that you were reunited with your birth mother. What an awesome experience that must have been for both of you. As you know though, not all adoptees will ever get the chance to meet or reunite with their birth parents. Like my niece for instance. She is from Russia and was put in an orphanage because her parents did not want her and could not take care of her. Because of her adoption, she is now with a family that loves, cherishes, prays and provides for her. She was from the “oven of another” mother and we thank God for that. Because of her and her life she has blessed a family more than words could express. God even used her mother who did not want her to give her the gift of life and because of her life many other lives will be and have been changed. Just like you have probably changed many lives for the better. Your mother is certainly a woman to be praised and your life is certainly one to be cherished. I pray every day you are able to look at your life as one of importance and one that has the potential to change the lives of many others for the better. Thank you again for your time and your thoughts.
sincerely,
Paige

By: Paige

Paige — Tue, 27 Oct 2009 12:00:52 +0000

Heather,
Thank you so much for taking the time to share your adoption experience in a comment on my blog. I appreciate your time and I am sorry that you have had to spend the your life grieving over the fact that you were adopted. I can only imagine what your birth mother must have gone through in having to give you up to another family to raise. I also can only imagine the joy you brought to the family that took you in and raised you as their own. I pray they did whatever they could for you in raising you that was in your best interest. Just like you as an adoptee, there are many adoptees/orphans in this world who’s parents were not so grieved by giving up their children. My niece for instance was found on the streets in Russia begging for food at 6 years old and was placed in an orphanage were her parents never came to see her or claim her for that matter. Had she not been adopted by my sister-n-law she would continue to be raised in the orphanage until she is 16 and then placed in a subsidized housing with people she has never known, an unfinished education and left to figure out on her own how to provide for herself and finish her education all the while living with people who could care less about her. Was being adopted a hard choice for her. Absolutely. She had no idea what it would be like to be raised in America, to leave the only family she knew which were her orphan friends, but because of her taking that leap of faith and trusting a family she barely knew, her life has forever been changed and so have the lives of many others. My niece now has a family that loves her, encourages her, provides for her prays for her and shares the ultimate gift of having a personal relationship with Christ with her. As of now Over 7 orphans from her orphanage have forever families and prayerfully through their stories in this cookbook many more families will be inspired and encouraged to take the leap into adoption and change the history of a person’s life forever. Could you look at this as offensive, sure you could, everything in life is a matter of perspective. However, God calls believers to look after the widows and the orphans and many people will never do that because of finances or fear.
I don’t even know you, but I pray that you are glad to at least be alive and given the chance at life even if it was with another family. Your mother is a woman to be praised for her sacrifice and her giving you the ultimate gift of life. Thank you again for your time and your opinion.
Sincerely,
Paige

By: Heather

Heather — Mon, 26 Oct 2009 15:41:43 +0000

I know that this book is being put together with the best of intentions but as an adoptee I need to let you know how offensive it is. I am not from “the oven of another”, I was born to a woman who was not able to keep me because society looked down on it. She has been grieving for 36 years and so have I. Adoption comes from great loss. A mother loses a child, that child it’s family. Yes, another family is formed, but it is still a very painful experience. Chronicling adoption stories in a cookbook is in bad taste. Would you pair recipes with stories of children who’s mothers died in childbirth? Adoption should be about the best interests of the child. I don’t think that it is in their best interest to have their story printed next to a recipe for meatloaf.